Check Mate Middle Earth
by OrlandoObsessed
Summary: A Girl leaves and her Chess set comes to life. Not for the closed minded. Sorry, If we write any more we'll give everything away.
1. Character List

After reading our fic… We realized that you may want to know What positions on the board each character holds. So:

_Ivory_:  
Aragorn King  
Arwen Queen  
Gandalf Bishop  
Frodo Bishop  
Merry Knight  
Pippin Knight  
Legolas Rook  
Gimli Rook

_Ebony_:  
Sauron King  
Witch King Queen  
Gollum/Smeagol Bishop  
Gollum/Smeagol Bishop  
U'ru Khai Knight  
U'ru Khai Knight  
Sarumon Rook  
Wormtongue Rook


	2. The Beginning

Author's note: First let us say we are to entirly different people. I, OrlandoObsessed, am writting this piece with a friend by the name of WolfArcher.  
Disclamer: We own none of the following characters... I, OrlandoObsessed, however own a Lord of the Rings Chess set! ).  
_Invocation: Oh muse, hear me, and use me as your fingers to type this tale._

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"Check and mate, Dad you loose!"

"Now that wasn't very nice Suzie."

"Yeah I'm sorry dad."

"Dan, Suzie, if you two don't get a move on we aren't going to have time to pick Sue up before we get to the airport!"

"Coming dear," called Dan. "Suzie lets set this back up a minute, that way you don't come home to a completely trashed room." Suzie nodded and helped her dad reset the Lord of the Rings chess set that was a gift from her grandmother. When the board was set up in the proper order, Suzie picked up her bags and took one last look at her favorite poster. With a sigh she flicked off the light and bounded down the hall.

The room was still, and silent. In the middle of the room, on the table upon which the chess set was, well, set a strange breeze blew. I bet you know what happened next. Yes the chess pieces came to life, but only the ivory side or the good people "woke up". Lets run down the list shall we. Gimli, Merry, and Pippin pulled several kegs of dark ale out of thin air and began a loud drinking game. Gandalf and Frodo went off to a corner of the board to talk about the meaning of life because they're deep like that. Aragorn and Arwen… well, imagen if you can being frozen, but conscious, standing next to the love of your life… We'll leave it at that. Legolas rejected all social interaction, instead he began using the still "sleeping" orcs and other ebony figures as target practice, not that he needed it. The Sam's, all eight of them, slept on. This went on for a good while. Legolas would stop every once in a while to retrieve his arrows from between the eyes, shoulders blades and the occasional thighs of the ebony figures. Feeling satisfied after a few rounds he went off to join Gimli, Merry and Pippin.

Several minutes followed without any incident. The drinking game escalated and in the confusion Pippin slipped and fell into one of the pawn/Sam's (lets just call them the Sam's from now on). In perfect unison, the Sam's turned to face the young hobbit. "Fool of a Took," they chanted. Then they turned forward once more and promptly fell back to sleep. This stopped and sobered everyone. Even Aragorn and Arwen stopped their… er… fun to see what had happened. No one moved, except Gimli who swayed ever so slightly on his feet. Gandalf calmly walked up and down the row of a Sams. Each had the same expression on his face. Blank, unreadable, staring into oblivion.

"Creepy," whispered Merry.

"Yes," agreed Gandalf. "I don't quite understand. Pippin, since this is your discovery you may be the first to expand on it. Please tap a Sam on the shoulder." Pippin did this the ran and hind behind Merry. Gandalf nodded.

" Now Pippin if you-"

"There is no way I going to do anything to those creeps again," interrupted Pippin. "Fine, Frodo, if you would." Frodo nodded and positioned himself squarely in front of a Sam and gave him a big shove. All eight Sams sprang to life and hesitantly pounced on Frodo.

Frodo crawled from the pile of flying hobbit arms, bruised and confused.

"What happened?" asked Frodo, rather dazed.

"I'm not quite sure," responded Gandalf. The Sams untangled themselves and went back to their squares.

"Sams are one," sighed the Sams falling back to sleep.


	3. Don't Hurt My Sammies

"Well," grunted Gimli. "I suppose that explains something."

"Yes," murmured Gandalf. "But most definitely not everything." He began to pace in front of the slumbering Sams.

"I've got it!" exclaimed Legolas. He reached over his shoulder and pulled out an arrow which he nocked. "We shoot all but one Sam so things can go back to normal!"

"NO!" yelled Frodo. "You can't do that to my Sammies!" Everyone stopped, again, and looked at the reddening Frodo. Legolas was so stunned that he released his arrow and stumbled at the same time. The arrow shot through the air and landed with a dull thump in the pillow on Suzie's bed. Merry and Pippin could only suppress the drunken laughter for so long and when it came, it came it gales. It wasn't very long until both hobbits were rolling on the board clutching their sides. Frodo's face went from slightly pink to bright red. He stormed off and hid behind the ebony figures.

"I never expected Frodo…" commented Arwen. "Well I wish him and Sams the best of luck." Then she looked seriously into Aragorn's eyes and they were no longer a part of the conversation.

Merry and Pippin were still rolling on the game board convulsing with laughter. The Sams woke up but were confused. 'Which way to go,' they wondered in monotonous thoughts. 'To Frodo the apple of our many eyes or to the convulsing idiots laughing at the delicious apple?' In the end they passed Merry and Pippin on their way to Frodo.

Being the only two left standing for various reasons, Legolas and Gimli went on to explore the room. They found many things baring Legolas' likeness. Pictures, action figures, (though they did not know what the action figures were.) all varying in size from the same size as this Legolas to about twenty time the size of this Legolas. (Oh that would be a life size cardboard cutout of Legolas.) Everything had the words "Lord of the Rings" written on it some where, along with a ring. It took them a while before they figured out that the ring was actually the Ring of Power, did they comprehend that the person living in that room was a loony.

Legolas climbed the bed to retrieve his arrow and also to have a look around the room from a better vantage point. As he looked around, he spotted the ebony orcs surrounding the pile of Sams and Frodo. Legolas nocked the arrow once more and shoot an orc who gave out a gurgling cry and died. The gurgle alerted the Sams to the orcs presents, and they immediately sprang into action, hauling themselves reluctantly off Frodo. As the orcs drew swords, Sams drew swords and frying pans. (Frodo crawled away looking frightened and rather disappointed)

The Sams were the first to attack. In a furry of little hobbit arms orc appendages flew. Guttural was cries filled the Lavender painted room. Once ebony orcs # 1-8 lay on the board all missing various things… the Sams regained their original qualities and went back, to Frodo's farther disappointment, to their respective squares and dropped into a stiff sleep.


	4. The Giggling Idiots

Caution: This is a very short chapter. Mind your head.

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Frodo stood there for a moment, muttering something about never seeing eight hobbits at the same time again before stomping off to a P.O.ed sleep. The orcs did something quite interesting at this point. All of their lost appendages few back to their owners who remained in a rehabilitating doze.

After all of the excitement of the battle ever one stopped what they were doing to have a closer look at the Sams and orcs. Even Aragorn and Arwen discontinued their… activities. Out of no where Legolas lost an arrow. It whizzed past everyone narrowly missing Gandalf's ear and landed once more in Suzie's pillow. When the initial shock wore off the group turned to see Gimli pinning the elf to the board.

"Let me up, you great hairy lump!" shouted Legolas. (Very unbecoming of an elf prince.)

"I will when you give me your word you won't try to kill off all but one Sam so things can go back to normal."

"Okay, you have my word."

"Thank you."

"It won't do you any good," said the elf dancing around and smiling from ear to pointy ear.

"Why not?"

"I had my fingers crossed!" Legolas gave a short, loud laugh and took off running at top speed with Aragorn and Gimli close behind. They chased each other around the board like either small children or idiots (you choose). Gandalf stood and watched and quickly became more and more annoyed.

"That is enough!" he commanded. When the giggling trio would not listen, he cast a field around them causing them to fall flat on their fannies. Hearty laughs followed the girlish giggles but were cut short by Gandalf's stern look. Attempting to look ashamed they went off to retrieve the weapons shed to make them go faster.

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Okay, I really don't want to type any more tonight and I feel like leaving you in the middle of something. Before I go I must thank our reviewers. A special thanks goes out to JadeFIre catching that spelling thing. Neither one of us could find our books. ) TTFN 


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